Paul Kiger

As more people are becoming familiar with the term gaslighting, it is important to have an understanding of what gaslighting is and is not.  Victims of gaslighting are deliberately and systematically fed false information that leads them to question what they know to be true, often about themselves. They may end up doubting their memory,…

We often judge other people by their actions but ourselves by our intentions. We see the best in ourselves when we do something but can tend to look at the negative aspects of others’ actions instead of thinking about what their intentions might be. If we can begin to think less negatively and more positively,…

As a therapist, the number one issue I see that my clients struggle with, outside of diagnosable disorders, is negative thinking. The way we think affects how we feel, and how we feel affects how we act. So, if we are thinking negatively about an event in our life it will cause us to feel…

Euphoric recall is the idea that one looks back on the past with rose colored glasses, seeing it in a more favorable light. This can sometimes lead one back into bad relationships or relapse on substances as it can cause them to forget why they distanced themselves from those issues in the first place.  

In our lives, we often make things matter more than they need to. If something is important and we want to address it we can. However, there is a benefit in slowing down and thinking about why something carries a charge for us and why it matters. In this video I talk about our tendency…

Sometimes when trying to process our thoughts and feelings, especially related to a conflict with someone, we get more angry with the person or situation because we think about all of the things they could say or do, even if they have not. In this video I talk a little about what ruminating is as…

We often carry the emotions of other people. Although it is important to be kind, empathetic, and sensitive to the emotions of others, we do not have to bear the weight of their emotions if we set realistic/healthy expectations and speak our truth in love with words of peace.  

Although the holiday season is joyous for many, it can be difficult for others and can often be stressful. Here are a few simple, concrete ways to help make your holiday season healthy and less stressful.  

How to decrease suffering in your life by practicing acceptance.  

5 simple ways to have a healthier, more well balanced, life.

Many times in our relationships we sacrifice being in harmony with the other person for being right. A key question to remember is would you rather be happy or right?    

Simple, concrete ways to support people in recovery.  

Insights about addiction and how relapse often starts with thoughts long before the actual relapse.  

5 Minute Read As we enter a new year most of us think about the last year; the good, the bad, and the ugly. And then we stop, take a deep breath, and begin to think about what the new year has in store. We make big, lofty goals and talk about how we are…

5 minute read As millennials begin to approach middle adulthood, many are enjoying the benefits that come with it including more stable friendships, jobs/income, increased self-awareness and a better sense of who they are. However, they are now also beginning to experience something that profoundly affected many of them when they were children, divorce.  The…

A bubble bath and a glass of red wine. This is what we typically think or hear when we talk about self-care, which has become a huge buzz word in the last few years.  The concept of self-care has become more popular but there is still a large misunderstanding of what self-care is and how…

Mindfulness. Some misconstrue it for meditation or something where you sit quietly for an hour. Well yes, but no. Mindfulness means being present in the moment. We are more un-mindful now than any other time in human history. We have technology to thank for that. One might think this is leading into an article all…

“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.”  – Laurell K. Hamilton, Mistral’s Kiss Why is addiction, destructive behavior and early-death synonymous with Music and the Performing Arts? Is it a given that the most talented will be the most tortured, and that their…